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Forum Name: Joke of the Day
Forum Description: Bookmark this page for a few good laughs!
URL: http://www.baitshopboyz.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=20209 Printed Date: 26 March 2026 at 21:10 Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: The cowboyPosted By: 788Fan
Subject: The cowboy
Date Posted: 12 August 2010 at 14:49
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A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote
mountainous pasture in California
when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Monaco
sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I
tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give
me a calf?"
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing
herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to
his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on
the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get
an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that
scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image
processing facility in Hamburg,
Germany .
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and
the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected
Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives
a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have
exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says
Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why
not?"
”You're a Democrat Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie,"but how did you guess
that?"
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here
even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of
equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't
know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that
matter. This is a herd of sheep.
”Now give me back my dog."
------------- "We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the universe. That makes us something very special." Stephen Hawking 1942-2018
Replies: Posted By: Irish Bird Dog
Date Posted: 12 August 2010 at 15:45
I'm not all that sure a real CowBoy would be herding a herd of sheep.....but I do get the point of the joke.....and it ain't no joke about the "sheep" counters in D.C.
------------- Irish Bird Dog
NRA Life/Endowment
2nd Amendment Supporter
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 13 August 2010 at 02:41
Posted By: Dennis Keith
Date Posted: 18 August 2010 at 02:49
Hard times being what they are, A Real Cowboy, would take a job watching sheep.
He would find them just as dumb as cattle, but softer kicking.
Posted By: rivet
Date Posted: 18 August 2010 at 10:16
That was funny. Nice to get a mile now and then.
------------- FIRE IS OUR FRIEND!
Posted By: CB900F
Date Posted: 18 August 2010 at 16:01
Fella's;
When I was young, I hired out as summer help on ranches in Wyoming. I can tell you as a point of absolute fact that sheep are dumber'n cattle.
900F
------------- Birth certificate!? He don't need no steenkink birth certificate!!
Posted By: Irish Bird Dog
Date Posted: 18 August 2010 at 17:19
....uh. er..CB, you weren't that thar Wyoming CowBoy featured in those Wyoming sheep jokes was you?????
------------- Irish Bird Dog
NRA Life/Endowment
2nd Amendment Supporter
Posted By: CB900F
Date Posted: 19 August 2010 at 10:34
IBD;
You needs to getcherself eddicated. It's North Dakotans that're featured in sheep jokes. A man in Wyoming can run two cows an' a coupla thousand sheep, but he'll still refer to himself as a cattleman.
900F
------------- Birth certificate!? He don't need no steenkink birth certificate!!
Posted By: Irish Bird Dog
Date Posted: 19 August 2010 at 11:59
opps..........since you got the ranch in MT which I dun did see, I guess U is a cowboy ifn you wants to be...........didn't notice any sheeps there either.......